Friday, April 20, 2012

I can't cure You!

I know about this pain that you feel!
I know about this deep darkness... I know how much horrible can be receive someone asking "are you ok?"...

It's horrible pain!
Nobody can cure, only yourself!

This war you fight alone!

What I can do to help you?
I feel impotent!
I know about your pain... I almost can feel inside me... It's too much to hold!

I wanna be the light in this darkness, the relieve to this heart...

Please don't cry!
Be stronger!
I'm here behind you...

What I can do?... If I can't cure you...
I'm still here, I'm still praying for you...

I'm praying always for you...

Tuesday, March 20, 2012

Repeat again...

This night I'm on my house, trying think about the future...

The music back to my life by another way, but I'm lost a little, yet! Cause everything changes very fast in my life... This time isn't different!

Everything comes to my life so suddenly...

I need decide to keep this way, or be afraid and hide me from myself...
Seems so easy when I speak, but decide my whole life is difficult, cause I was hurted so deeply once and I DON'T WANT SUFFER AGAIN...

I'm the one that feels it?

Decide is difficult... Decide again, is more difficult... Feel afraid isn't good! But I need to be stronger!

I want to send away from me, every darkness of my heart and every pain that I have inside my chest!

I want hold this hope with my whole love and reach the happiness one time on my life...

And...
If I forget this words, repeat again... Please!

Thursday, January 5, 2012

I'm still here! I'm waiting...

The years come and goes... 3 years already goes...

Sometimes, I know that you are around me...
You don't say anything, but I feel you looking me...
I know that you feel this conection so stronger between us...
Maybe our lesson in this life, is understand that, we never will lost each other!

It's so difficult...
Sometimes I feel so lonely, but I don't want another person with me!
Maybe I'm crazy... But I choose you one time more!

(My dress in this new year party was RED... coincidences?)

The only thing that you need know is: I'm truly and only YOURS, forever!

I miss you... Yet.

Wednesday, December 28, 2011

One step closer... one step back...

Day after day I ask to my self if I'm crazy...


But when my feet seems without floor, the truth appears again...

In this moment I'm broken again...
The truth is there...

Why he can't accept my love?!
I seem a crazy girl just running after some illusion!
But all the time I believe that he feel something... I'm not crazy! I see his eyes six months ago, I felt like some cold sensation inside my body when he looks me so deep in my eyes... I'm not crazy!

Maybe, his hurt inside his heart is some love, or his own love...

I was thinking about my first love, my old love... but I couldn't find!
Because he is like my older love, my first... like an eternity... like always... ever... before and after... no beginning... no end...

I'm not crazy!
I know how much I'm feeling broken, I know how much tears I cried...

In this moment I'm broken, because someone was hurted by him, but she is not me...
I can support everything, but it I can't to support!

I'm sad... upsad! yes.

But I know, I'm not crazy!
I know what I feel.

Monday, October 31, 2011

It's Over?!

When the light of stars are shining,my mind wonder to the space...
If the wind just blows, go to anyway...

I think about you!
And this sound of your remind is like some acoustic guitar playing!
The sound of your voice, the music of your words, the melodic breath... it's breathing inside me all the time!

the way is getting over...
The time is running...
it's just a little bit and I'll say goodbye!

I need complete this time, cause this life is not eternal...
The death will come soon, but not before complete this way!

Be mine one more time, before this way is over...

Tuesday, October 18, 2011

The end

The time pass... pass before my eyes...
And I see my life going to some place that I don't know...

I see the circles completing and journeys going to the end...
I see a eternal love going to the infinite, without hope...

The darkness of night is coming more and more, but I never know if I'll open my eyes again...

A friend going to the death, his girlfriend going to the darkness to the sadness...

Who will chose the right way?! Or everybody will keep this way without hope?!

My hope is going down...
I can't feel the flowers perfume anymore...
I feel that it's a final of way... if you broke my heart again, I don't wanna live anymore!

Thursday, October 13, 2011

I can't tell you...

Today the sky is gray, but the clouds don't cry yet...
It's like my eyes that don't cry this tears like a rain!
The same cry when you goes the first time...

I can't say my word for you, cause you don't read my messages anymore!
This is killing me and I have no straight to keep my way...

Your birthday pass, and couldn't say everything what I wanted!
I wanted to say how I feel, how much I miss you...
I wanted screen "Please, believe me!" "Please, forgive me!"...
I wanted hug you so stronger...

I have no energy to keep my life...
I wake up every morning and think: "I need to keep, I have a objective on my life!"

I have so much things to say for you... I miss our conversations... I miss to read your blog and find a message for me, there... I love your way to send messages!

I have no light in my life, in this moment... I hope to survive.

Saturday, September 24, 2011

Why?

Just spending words to the wind, now I write a new text using the same thoughts...

Waiting a miracle that never come, I cry like a stronger rain in the summer!
My feeling is unbelievably deep and painful!
How I'll speak with you again? I can't accept that it's a ending... sad ending...

My spirit refuse accept the injustice! Where is the truth? That never come to the surface!
Where is the ears to hear this truth?

Why you don't believe me? Why you never told me if you believe or not?

The hardest question to answer is "WHY?"!

Friday, August 19, 2011

Things that you never will read...

I'm here, just writing... writing things that you never will read!

Cause my feelings, maybe, you never will understand!

I listen the wind singing out side of my window...I really don't what he says...

The cold wind blows and can't stop to sing... what, what means?

The past, come to my heart, and this images are vivid to my eyes...

The wind is the responsible for this sensation?

Everything is coming colder and colder, day by day, over and over again...

I know you don't will read... but if you only knew that you are my inspiration...

How I can write? How I can sing?

The wind keep singing in this cold night... and I still can't understand what means...

Thursday, August 4, 2011

Heavy Chest

Inside me it's like a big and heavy rock...
My chest hurts...

The truth exist?
Where is my hope?...

I really wanna try walk...
I really wanna try to keep in this way...

But how I'll can to do it?!
My legs are tired, my chest is heavy like a rock...
My hands don't move anymore!

Why this way is so difficult?
Why this suffer never end?
Why this peace never come?
Why why why?

The jokes from people that wants me sad are coming to limit of my straight!
They play them dirty games with me and never be tired to do the wickedness!

How much more I need to fight?
Where is the end?!
Where is the justice???

I just will keep with my heart without malice, and don't will judge!
I know that the truth is the light on my life!
Everything will be right in the right time...

When is the right time?
I really don't know...

In this moment, this pain just burn my soul...